To Gag or Not To Gag, That Is The Question......

Somehow I doubt Shakespeare ever encountered this particular situation. Although, you never know…I suppose it’s possible that good old Wills had to chase around his little dog, Julius Woof-ser and stop him from eating the nasties….

***PETER PAN ALERT***

Ok, so here’s the new rule. In order to prevent all of you from gagging…….or worse, from now on when I’m going to post something that will be in gross detail I’ll start the entry with that. I know at this point only two of you know the whole story behind that warning…and at some point, either Beth or I will have to retell the story to fill you in…but until that day comes….just trust me when I write that. LOL

So…..this morning as we’re going through our normal routine to get ready for work, Sarge is being his usual cute self and wanting to cuddle every five minutes and wanting to have his toys thrown to him every two minutes. I had taken him outside already for his morning potty and he was happy. Well, he has learned our routine well enough that he knows we will be at work all day so if he has to go again before we have to leave he lets us know. Not a problem, I appreciate his mindful consideration so I don’t have to worry about an accident on the floor if we get stuck in traffic on the way home.

So anyway,…..when we got down and had about a half hour left before we had to leave, Sargie asked if he could go out again. Since I was doing my hair Ben took him this time. Moments later, they returned and Sargie trotted down the hall past me and popped the door open to go to his fort. (If you don’t know about that read my last entry) I looked over and saw him come out a moment later only to run into our bedroom and jump on the bed just as I heard Ben come walking down the hall. I saw him eating something and when I looked up at Ben, I noticed he had a banana in his hand and a small knife. So I assumed he was eating a piece of that. Now you have to understand, Sargie has a few favorite foods that he will tackle you for….and bananas are one of them. So I sweetly asked him, “Sargie, did daddy give you a piece of banana?” Sargie looked up at me and Ben with that oblivious “MMMM-MMM GOOD” look at the exact moment that Ben said, “No, I didn’t give him any yet…that’s why I came down here”

Oh, here we go again!

Instantly we were both like “….Dear Lord…what is he eating NOW?!?!?” We rushed into the bedroom and cornered him on the bed. There was a large wet spot….and as he innocently looked up at us we noticed he had white…..cream…on his lips and flecks of black…stuff….on his face. Both of us instantly recoiled but Ben was the first to say what we were both already thinking…. “What IS that????” I rushed around the side of the bed and as I did so, Sargie, who knows the routine by now, flipped the thing out of his mouth so we could inspect it closer. We both leaned in until we were hovering about three inches above this thing. Through all of Sargie’s spit, it looked like a cross between a chewed up piece of black gum and the inside of a walnut, neither of which would cause him to look like he had a milk mustache. As I got even closer to try and figure it out, all of a sudden Ben stood up straight and in a tone of voice that revealed he knew EXACTLY what it was, he burst out with… “AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW…………….was that a CATERPILLAR?!?!?.....UGHHHHHHHH!!!!! (It was at this point that both of us traded our previous gargoyle like faces of disgust for even WORSE gargoyle like faces of disgust as Sargie sat in proud admiration of his tasty tidbit.) “I saw it outside on the ground and realized one of us had stepped on it…but didn’t see it again. Then I saw him pick up what I thought was a leaf off the kitchen floor when we came in…..I guess it wasn’t a leaf……UGHHHHHHHH!!!!”

Ben grabbed a Kleenex from my side of the bed and tossed it to me so I could pick up the bug carcass and wipe the boy’s face and mouth, but by the time he saw the Kleenex coming his way he quickly licked his lips. UGHHHH……..

By this time Ben was thoroughly disgusted and left the room at which time Sargie had the rapturous realization of “BANANA???? Dad’s got BANANA?!?!?! I want banana………BANANA……GET THE BANANA!!!!!!” and leapt off the bed chasing Ben into the kitchen.

Meanwhile, I stood there….staring nauseously at the wet spot on the comforter and trying to dab it dry with the Kleenex….. All the while the only thing running through my head was that famously gross line from The Lion King cartoon where Timon, (who’s voice was provided by the perfectly sardonic, Nathan Lane) grabs a caterpillar from a dead log and says, “OOOHHH, the cream filled kind!” and pops it into his mouth.

I don’t think I will ever be able to watch that again without gagging.

Not how I wanted to start my Friday morning!

Boys Will Be Boys

Every boy needs a fort and apparently, boys of the K-9 variety are no different. If you haven’t noticed by now, our little fluff boy is very quirky….in a good way….and a VERY entertaining way. I know he thinks he’s human……and the way we pamper him, talk to him and take him everywhere possible…..well…..I’m not going to be the one to tell him he isn’t. LOL.

So ever since we got Sargie he follows us EVERYWHERE, he feels the need to be with us no matter where we are. Even when he is sooooo exhausted from a long day of playing, car rides or various other adventures…he simply cannot let us out of his sight. He will wake up out of a dead sleep and get up to follow you only to collapse on the floor of whatever room you’re in, then lead the way back when you’re done. If Ben is sitting at his computer in the office and I’m sitting in the living room on the laptop, Sarge will position himself in the kitchen doorway so he can see us both at the same time. There is however one exception that we have discovered.

In the guest bedroom, I have an old antique bed that sits very high off the floor in the far corner of the room. Next to it I have an antique leather steamer trunk that sits open against the wall to display my collection of teddy bears. On the other side of the trunk is a wooden rocking chair, which sits next to the bedroom closet. Now….in order to fully understand what I’m going to tell you next, we need to shift from human perspective to dog perspective.

Tall bed+ corner +floor length comforter = fort

Trunk+ space beneath open lid+ next to fort = tunnel

Rocking chair+ next to tunnel = camouflaged look out point

Open closet door+ next to camouflaged look out point = U-turn or emergency escape hatch

See where I’m going with this now? Yep…..the mini marine has created a fort for himself….and he plays in it EVERY day. Sometimes it’s cute, other times it’s exasperating. Usually it’s cute though and chances are if I can’t find one of his toys….or all of his toys…it’s because he has carried them inside the fort and hidden them somewhere that only he can see. When we’re in that bedroom using the ironing board or doing something else he will run in and slide across the wood floor as if he’s sliding into home plate then scuttle himself right under the bed just as quickly as his furry little feet will take him. Instantly he begins his back and forth run under the bed, through the tunnel, behind the look out point into the closet to turn around and do it again. Sometimes he will sit at the lookout and monitor what’s going on, other times he will lay down and relax inside the tunnel or in the cool corner of the fort. It’s his own personal game and he thinks you can’t see him. If you sneak over the top of the trunk though and peek down to look at him he gets very upset that you’ve found him and spoiled his fun.

This morning as I was ironing my shirt he went through his usual routine only to find that I had closed the closet door the night before. This I found was COMPLETELY unacceptable to him, and he didn’t think twice to verbalize his frustration to let me know it. I could hear him batting at the door to try to open it and when he wasn’t successful he immediately called my name (in dog language that is) so I could come help him. I walked over to the other side of the rocking chair and was met by his white eye lashed blinking eyes. I asked him what he wanted (as if I didn’t know…lol) and his response was to turn and bump the closet door with his nose then turn back to look at me (Don’t tell me dogs don’t understand! This kid KNOWS when we talk to him). I decided to play hardball to see what he would do, so I said, “No, you don’t need the closet door open…you can come out and turn around.” I went back to my ironing. A moment passed and I heard his frustrated sigh as he pawed at the door more to try and get it open then finally let out another yelp. I went back to look at him again and he stood there staring at me, blinking those adorable eyes and wondering WHY on earth I wasn’t helping him. Finally, I relented and opened the closet door. He happily clambered inside, turned around, and went back through the tunnel and into the fort.

Now like I said, usually it’s cute like this morning was when he goes to play in his fort. However, other times, it is much less than cute. As I’ve mentioned before, he loves to steal paper, empty toilet paper rolls and dryer sheets….among other things, but those are his favorites. Well this past week I caught on to a VERY sneaky little trait that he has developed……pre-meditation.

So…..when the other rooms are not in use we close the doors. A new habit we have developed since we discovered Sargie’s little recon missions to raid things he deems chewable. The doors aren’t locked, just lightly shut to keep him out and he is VERY good about adhering to boundaries…..that is until he discovered the privacy of his fort. Well it seemed harmless enough to let him pop the door open so he could retreat to his little area whenever he felt like it. Until the other day when I witnessed something that blew me away. I sat on the bed working on the laptop and saw him come into the bedroom and walk over to Ben’s trash can to see what was inside, a few ripped up pieces of junk mail…not a big haul. I watched him to see if he was going to pull anything out and was pleasantly proud of him when he didn’t. He turned back around and walked to the hallway completely unaware that I was watching him. Then I saw him go to the guest bedroom door and pop it open. I smiled thinking how cute he is that he was going to go to his little fort and I started to look back at the computer screen. That’s when I noticed him turn back around and slowly walk over to Ben’s trash. He slowly leaned his head over the top of the rim of the basket and looked for a moment then reached in as if trying not to set off an alarm and grabbed a mouthful of paper. Then as if shifting gears he spun around and flew out the door and towards his hideout. I couldn’t believe it! I shouted his name, tossed the laptop to the foot of the bed, and took off after him. Let me tell you chasing after a dog that just dove under a fort and skittered for his escape hatch was not my idea of an evening’s relaxation.

Yeah….you read that right. This adorable and highly intelligent little furball just learned how to carry out a pre-meditated crime! Unbelievable! I was in such shock I had to call Ben…and of course now that we’re dog parents I had to do it correctly, “Ben…..come look what YOUR son just did!!!” I know it was all he could do not to burst out laughing in spite of my shocked frustration. Sooooooo the dilemma now is not to keep the door locked, but every night we have to empty the wastebaskets throughout the house to make sure that he can’t scrounge for paper. Thankfully, he doesn’t touch the kitchen garbage, that doesn’t even interest him…..just the paper trash….only DOGS eat out of the kitchen garbage I guess…..LOL.

**sigh** Never a dull moment in the Babij household…..lol

Remind me to tell you about the "baked bean incident" one of these days.

Enough is Enough...and That's Enough

Soooooo it’s been a loooooong five days. I woke up last Friday with a very distinct prelude to a cold. That hollowed out feeling in your stomach; a slight fever and that “THING” in your sinuses that makes you sound as if you’re talking from the bottom of a well. I did my usual, loaded up on Zycam and Tylenol, and bundled up. Figured it might last a day and then things would be back to normal….other than that though, I wasn’t really too bummed because I knew it meant I would actually get some rest over the weekend.

**sigh** Friday came and went, Saturday came and went, Sunday came and went….STILL felt like a lump of germs….Monday came and went, Tuesday came…..still no relief. I slept until about noon when the dog woke me up. I went to take some Dayquil and had to stop myself. I hadn’t eaten and through trial and error Dayquil and I have come to an agreement. I will never again take it on an empty stomach and it will never again make me lose my cookies in an unflattering way. So upon recollection of this agreement I knew I had to eat something.

I shuffled my way to the kitchen trying not to trip over the fluff boy along the way because he was so joyously jumping up and down that I had finally felt good enough to get out of bed and play with him. All the while I’m feeling like a slug.

So I arrive in the kitchen and open the refrigerator only to realize there is no food that doesn’t require cooking….and last time I checked condiments, though readily available, still don’t make a meal. **SIGH**….not even bread for toast...I really must go grocery shopping. Hmmm…no energy to cook and no appetite to eat anything having to be cooked. Time for plan B, I decide to go look and see what canned goods I have. Maybe a nice soup…. So I trudge downstairs to the where the pantry is and proceed to open the cupboards. Hmmm…the only soup is cream of chicken, cream of celery and cream of mushroom. Not an appetizing choice at the moment. Cranberry sauce….ehhh…no…. Tons of tomato sauce and canned tomatoes for Mr. B’s chilies and salsas….and every hot sauce imaginable to man…..I really do need to write an entry one of these days about the Bear and his pepper fetish. Anyway, just then I hit the no cooking required mother load. Let’s see a whole little section of possibilities….albacore tuna, wax beans, beans and franks, and turkey Spam. After much deliberation,…I settled on the beans and franks. Not at all a favorite, but considering I couldn’t taste anything ANYWAY it seemed the least offensive.

A short time later as Sargie and I sat curled up in bed, me eating my lunch feeling crummy and him gnawing on his bone I had another one of “THOSE” moments. What good is coming out of this….5 days of feeling crummy….where is that, “oh, well that makes it all worth while” moment….it had to be there somewhere and I just hadn’t seen it yet. Yes, if you haven’t figured it out by now I REALLY DO believe this about EVERYTHING and REALLY DO attempt to always practice what I preach. So I asked God, “Where is it? What was the reason behind me being here this long….I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished much or had much impact on anyone or anything. I mean, I trust that you have a reason….I just sure as heck don’t see it…..”

So I finished lunch and decided to turn on the computer and catch up on emails and Facebook and consider my next blog entry as I pondered my question. Just then, the phone rang. I considered not answering it…I felt crummy and the thought of talking to somebody was a bit daunting. I decided to check the caller ID though and see who it was. Lori…hmmm…it was after her lunchtime and she knew I was home sick, so she was probably checking in to see how I was feeling. I picked it up.

What met me next was a sound you hate to hear in general and it’s even worse from the other end of a phone…especially when it’s coming from somebody you care about. Sobs, hysterical and frantic sobs. I immediately jumped up and tried to get her to tell me what was wrong. Amid the sounds of crying, her car keys and door alert in the background and the car engine starting I heard the word “mom” and I instantly remembered her mom had gone to a Dr appointment that morning… My heart sank, Oh Lord, no….not her mom…not now….. Over the next few moments she explained to me as best she could, what was going on….and the outlook was bad…VERY bad. Instantly I began to pray out loud…..to pray for peace, to pray for wisdom, to pray for protection as she tried to drive on one of the busiest highways from her job, 6 towns away all the way to the hospital where her mother was in the ER. Anything that crossed my mind as being important to pray for at that moment I threw in there like a machine gun set on rapid fire.

In an instant, I told her if she wanted me to go with her, I would, and she did. I swear I have never gotten showered and dressed, walked the dog and fixed my hair with time to spare, so quickly in my life. I sent out a quick blurb to some friends who know her and called Ben to let him know what was up and I waited.

In the hours that followed, there was a lot of waiting and hugging and waiting and crying. At one point as we waited for her to be given a room of her own and transported from the ER, I sat in the waiting room thinking and people watching. Then I realized something…..if I hadn’t been sick for the past five days I would have been at work when this happened. If I had been at work I wouldn’t have been able to pray with Lori at that moment, I wouldn’t have been able to jump up and go with her to the hospital at a moments notice and I wouldn’t have been able to stay with them as they waited. So I had my answer….my “Oh, well that makes it all worth while” moment. Was five days of bed-ridden crummy-ness worth it to be able to be there for a friend when she needed it? Absolutely….and I would go through it all again and worse if need be.

Lori and I talked a lot last night…. In person for hours and over IM for a while too. In the end we BOTH concluded that now more than ever, regardless of what happens in life, good and bad….it ALL has a purpose and good will ALWAYS come of it…no matter what. It sounds corny, and the ultimate in Pollyanna thinking, but it’s sure a heck of a lot better than the alternative. I would far rather go through life looking for the good in all the sad, painful, and frustrating things that come my way than to turn bitter and miserable every time things don’t turn out the way I had hoped.

This morning as I was catching up on reading my devotions I was intrigued by yesterday’s entry. The entire thing was very good, but one of my favorite scriptures was highlighted and it was just soooooo fitting.

“Proverbs 31:25 reminds us, "she can laugh at the days to come."

She [The Proverbs 31 woman] was filled with such incredible joy not because life was perfect but simply because she had decided to make laughter, peace, and truth the hallmarks of her life. Proverbs 31:30 goes on to say this was a woman to be praised because she so reverenced God in the shrine of her heart. She knew without a doubt, He was - and still is - enough.”

Now Lori and her family have a long road ahead of them, and it won’t be easy… and it won’t be tearless….but ultimately, good will come of it…every single moment of it. Things in my life won’t always go the way I hoped and sometimes they will just plain suck and look hopeless, BUT good WILL come of every moment of it. Why? Simple…..because God is and always will be….ENOUGH.